Can gay women say fag
The "F-Slur": Where It Comes From & How Some Are Reclaiming It
Content warning (CW): The text below contains the use of slurs.
The reality is downcast but true: "Faggot” is, and has often been, used to describe LGBTQ2S+ people negatively, particularly the feminine ones.
It doesn't matter if you're:
- a 14-year-old lad with an effeminate walk
- a 50-year-old man who likes to paint his nails
- or somebody who just likes dressing however the hell they want
"Faggot” is a cruel catchall used to describe, typically, any male who is gay, soft-spoken, or who doesn't fit the stereotypically (toxic) definition of masculinity.
"Real men" doze with women, curse, yell, play sports, never sob, are always ready for a fight, and don't wear nail polish, makeup, lots of jewelry, or anything that calls into question their masculinity, right?
Books can, and have, been written about the genesis of this narrow-minded view of manhood. Its exploit in the American English language can actually be traced back to the early 1900s, but as with so many other words, its true origins are a bit of a mystery.
Thankfully, the resiliency of LGBTQ2S+
Can I say the “f-word”?
I was at a concert the other night. The singer was a very openly lgbtq+ artist, singing to a very openly gay crowd. About twenty minutes in, the singer shouted to the audience, “Is anyone queer in here?” and was met with a roaring response. She laughed and said, “Get the fuck out, f*****s.” The theater lulled in uncomfortable tension. Then the display went on.
Now, if the singer had been a direct white male saying that on stage, the response would have been unlike. There may own been outrage, boycotting, or other forms of backlash. Nobody left though, and nobody said anything in opposition. She’s gay, which arguably gives her the opportunity to exploit that word. But, it still made some people uncomfortable.
I’m all for self-expression; anyone should be able to spot however the hell they want. If she wants to call herself a f*g, that’s her prerogative. The audience froze because she chose to phone them by that term.
But how did the f-slur turn into such a burdened expression?
Originally, the synonyms was used to describe a bundle of sticks, according to Merriam Webster. These sticks were used by new boys who did chores for their older peers
Why Straight People Shouldn't Throw Around the F-Word
Because it isn’t for you
If 2019 taught us anything it’s that people *really* don’t like organism policed around what they can or can’t declare. You’ll hear the matching arguments - “freedom of speech!” - as mere excuses for why they want to say societally naughty things. Of course, they forget that ‘freedom of speech’ was enshrined into law to guard individuals (namely, the press) from state intervention (namely, punishment and death).
Nowadays, you also get straight allies throwing around “fag” as an apparent act of solidarity! Support! Gay rights! Thank you, Hilary!
And in 2020 you’ll also uncover a number of self-identifying faggots, who’ve very actively decided to strip away the word’s power and reclaim the slur all for themselves. This is very understandable given the politics and history of the word. But it’s also important to be respectful to those in the community who just can’t see it this way… who’ve been far too burned by that very same politics and history.
To some, the pos will always carry too much pain.
So, it’s necessary we continue to arrive back and check up on our own privilege; this applies to people within
The fag hag. Never were two more scornful words so spectacularly smashed together. Stereotypes around the fag hag, fruitfly, fish, handbag – whatever you’d concern to call her – abound.
Search the Internet and you’d believe she’s a sad, overweight, trashy woman with too many cats unable to snag her own boyfriend or husband. Derision comes from queer quarters almost as often as from direct bystanders.
However, a closer examination of the history of the everyday fag hag and her references in pop culture reveals a more subversive and courageous figure. Fag hags have gone from “beards” who hide their homosexual friends’ sexuality to fashionable best friends epitomised by Grace in the TV series Will and Grace, which has just been revived.
Further reading:Faggots, punks, and prostitutes: the evolving language of gay men
It could be time to recast the moniker of “fag hag” as a badge of honour rather than a term of overuse. For the gay male, she has been protector, carer, cheerleader. For her, it is often an act of support. For the straight woman, he is a male comrade that doesn’t expect more, a confidante, and just possibly the reason to become more involved in lesbian, gay, bisexual a
LGBTQIA+ Slurs and Slang
bog queen
Synonyms: Bathsheba (composition between bathroom and Sheba to build a name reminiscent of the Queen of Sheba), Ghost (50s, ghost, because they wander the corridors of the bathroom).